In My Dreams
by FullmetalSong
Summary: He will never forget the battle. Her face. Her dreams. Or how the woman he loved died in his arms. A one shot KakashiRin fic.


Kakashi didn't know if the sky had turned red, or if the blood running down his forehead had finally managed to trickle into his eyes. All he saw was a red sky, decorated with splotchy black clouds.

It was like viewing a nightmare.

The battle had gone on for quite some time, hours upon hours ninja had fought against ninja. Now things had gone quiet at long last. The survivors of battle were picking themselves up so that they could seek medical attention. Their dark figures staggered across the dark corpse filled field. They already appeared to be dead by their uneasy and staggered strides across the red horizon.

Kakashi should have been one the few raggedy survivors that was looking to have his wounds healed. Instead, he was walking away from his camp. He walked toward the bloody and ugly field that had served as the place where many had died that day.

_(The sky… it's bleeding…then again so am I…)_ Kakashi thought foggily as he stumbled to walk around the fallen bodies of his friends and enemies.

Kakashi's right leg was broken in a few different places. With each step he took, he felt his break grind and snap as bone rubbed on bone. Dried blood was caked onto his right pant leg. Over all he was torn apart and looked like he had been to hell and back. His trade mark mask was shredded to pieces, reviling his soft pink lips as well as the rest of his face. Tattered pieces of his navy blue mask hung half heartedly at the sides of his face. His own blood, as well as the blood of others decorated his pale skin. Specks of black and crimson were speckled around his reflective eyes, over his nose, and even on his lips. Kakashi's skin was nearing white in shade from blood loss and exhaustion.

Kakashi's arms swung at his sides with each unsteady step he took. His muscles were tired from battle; they ached with the urge to be healed. His fragmented bones screamed to be rightly treated, not forced onto the battle field again. Kakashi ignored all the desperate pleas his body made. He marched on, half alive and clinging to conciseness.

_(Rin… Rin… please…)_ He thought numbly as he walked on in a zombie like state.

Blood, it was everywhere. The sky, his body, across the battle field. Kakashi could even taste the iron of blood on his tongue. The flavor glided across his parched tongue and oozed over his chapped gums.

Even the forehead protector which sat proudly on his forehead was dyed a deep black. It was sticky and starting to crackle with black fragments of blood falling into his eyes and down his face. The Konoha symbol on the silver plate was still untouched by the dark crimson that covered Kakashi. It shinned proudly in the darkness.

Kakashi could feel his mind starting to slip and scum to the surreal atmosphere provided by the scene around. The sea of blood and death was trying to sing to him. It begged him to lie down next to one of the fallen and sleep forever. Death's gentle grip was reaching out to him, asking him to rest just a while, just for eternity. Death sang a promise to Kakashi, of no more pain or battles. The only price he need pay for rest was his life.

He walked on. Not giving in to the siren's song. His lungs rattled with an in-hale of dry air. Kakashi would remain in the nightmare if it meant finally finding what he was searching for. There was no peace, no pleasure, no comfort, unless she was with him.

Kakashi looked down at his feet as he walked. Each step was a new pain and a new sensation that Kakashi denied his body to acknowledge. He had no time for his own pain; he had to find one person. She was the one he promised to protect with his life; the one he had promised would never be hurt as long as he lived. Kakashi's eyes blurred as he studied his unsteady and shaking steps. His vision of the ground below him was shaded in red. The red of a dying star, it was sick but vibrantly alive.

_(If battle is glory… and to die in battle is battle is glorious… why is everything so red? I always thought glory would be a blazing white light that would clear away the black and the red. Like waking to see dawn after a night filled with terrors. I always thought it would be a place where everything is warm, and the air doesn't stink of rotting flesh. It'd be a place where I could be with you forever… this can't be glorious. Rin is still missing…) _Kakashi mused as his eyes began to string.

Tears of irritation started to drip from Kakashi's eyes. The tears tried to clean the blood from his eyes desperately. Red rivers started to curve their way down his cheeks and fall to the black ground.

A soft breeze started to blow across the land. It gently tossed Kakashi's silver hair and made his body shiver violently. His open and bleeding wounds stung reminding him that if he didn't seek help soon, he'd bleed to death. The wind brought with it the smoke of the smoldering fires from battle. White and black wisps danced with each other as they traveled across the sick bleeding sky. Kakashi felt the bitter smell of burning flesh enter his nose. He couldn't help but cough on the stench of death. He felt his stomach turn and twist with displeasure of the smell.

_(I once heard that battle is hell… it never was for me. Till now…)_ He thought.

Kakashi's thoughts were abruptly interrupted by a stumble in his steps. He squinted to look down at his feet. More blood and tears poured down his sweaty face. His foot had tripped by a ninja's misplaced arm that had fallen in his path. The ninja it belonged to could have been on the other side of the battle field by now. As Kakashi's cool gray eye and his red Sharingan studied the served arm, his thoughts resumed.

_(Rin… I've got to find Rin…I can't let her be one of these corpses lying in the mud. I can't…)_ He desperately thought.

"Rin!" He called as loudly as he could. His voice was horse, dry from dehydration. It wasn't as full or loud as it normally was. It was sick and raspy, and nearly drained out by the numbers of bodies around. The bodies of the dead pulled down on his words, just as they were trying to pull him down as well.

"Ka..ka..shi…," a small voice whispered.

He looked up from his feet and from the sight of dead ninjas. He ignored the scattered limbs and organs to glance up at the red sky. To Kakashi, the bodies around disappeared. The chaos, the flames all floated away as a small voice tickled his ears. He turned his head; blurred red was all he was able to see.

"I'm… right here… Kaka… shi…-kun," the voice cooed again.

Kakashi's searching eyes became more panicked and intense than before. The voice was barely audible; at best it was a murmur. Still he was able to follow the last comment easier than the first reply. His broken legs carried his rebellious muscles toward the voice he heard in the darkness. As his feet made shifting sounds in the dark dirt, he pushed bodies aside with legs that would hardly carry him any more. His hands started to shake violently as he pressed on. The dead limbs of the ninjas around him seemed as if they were grabbing for his hardly living body now. They were grabbing onto him, trying to suck the life from him so that he would never find her. So that he could die alone like they had.

He ignored it all and just kept moving. The snapping of his bones wasn't existent to him. Nor was the cracking of tendons or the dripping blood pooling in his foot steps.

It was then that Kakashi felt a light tap at his leg. A blunt tap that made his leg scream and his eyes look down.

He looked down to find her.

Rin laid in a mass of dead flesh and broken weapons. She was visible only from the waist up. The rest of her small and delicate frame was covered in a swarm of dead ninja. Kakashi studied her in the red light he was starting to become accustom to. Her face was covered in a few layers of dirt and blood. Her light brown hair was dyed black by blood. Rin's warm eyes glanced up at Kakashi, as if he were her angel, finally come to free her from hell. She gazed at him as a small smile played over her lips.

"Found me…," She squeaked with the tiny voice of a scared child.

Kakashi's eyes were wide as he analyzed the girl before him. He bent over; his body answered the movement with violent shakes and convulsions. He then placed his unsteady arms under Rin. He jerked on her body. The mass of death that trapped half her shifted slightly. Kakashi pulled again, to no avail.

_(Let her go… let her go you bastards. I won't let you have her…)_ He thought in a slight panic.

Kakashi pulled on Rin again. His shoulders popped and blood dripped quicker than before from the numerous injuries on his arms. A bit of white bone that pierced his elbow turned red quickly. Kakashi fell to his knees as he freed Rin from the prison she had been under. Her eyes were on his, never fading for a second as he fought to pull her free.

Finally Kakashi freed Rin.

His eyes scanned her body in utter horror. Her legs were in a mangled in an unnatural position. Each jettisoned out in opposite directions, and was twisted at 180 degrees. Her torso was a mass of bumpy crushed bones and damaged organs. Her body was bruised, bloody, and very likely broke beyond repair.

The dark purple dress Rin normally wore was in shreds as well. It was dyed black just as Kakashi's forehead protector was. The form fitting royal purple dress was ripped beyond repair. Her bloody stomach was left exposed, only the bottom and top of the dress remain partly intact.

He lightly reached out with a gloved hand and placed his fingers on Rin's neck. He wanted to check how strong her pulse still was, if it was strong at all. He pressed down harder on her pale bleeding neck. As he counted the soft beats of her heart, he watched her chest rise and fall. Her breathing was labored and stressed, her lungs struggled to pull in air and expand. He heard a wet quality to her breathing. With his free hand he lightly touched her lower chest, trying to feel what condition her ribs were in.

All he felt was soft flesh with not much support left at all. He could feel cracked and snapped ribs, he had a feeling her ribs had pierced her lungs. She was drowning in her own blood. The gurgling in throat confirmed that.

Kakashi was shaken out of his analysis by a rough inhale of air that Rin took in. Her chest rose sharply. Kakashi turned both eyes to look at her face. Through his red vision he could see streams of tears starting to pour from her chocolate brown eyes. The river of tears trailing down her face cut through the dirt and blood on her soft cheeks. She looked at him; her chest shook with a sob, which was followed by violent coughing.

Kakashi could see blood drip from Rin's delicate lips. It started to collect in a pool under her head. The scarlet gathered in the black mud below her head.

"Kakashi-kun… I'm… sorry. I lost my ring," Rin said in a soft raspy voice.

It had only been a week ago that Kakashi had asked Rin to be his wife. A lot of their friends called them crazy for wanting to be married at 18, but they knew better than to listen to anyone else. Since Obito had died, Rin had become Kakashi's life. She was his best friend to begin with. Once Obito had fallen, Kakashi and Rin became even closer. They came to know each other better through grief for the third member of their team. It wasn't too long after Obito had passed that Kakashi found himself in love with the gentle but lively Rin. Everything about her drew Kakashi in. Her sparkly smile, her inviting eyes, her enchanting laugh.

He had no doubts about asking her to marry him, not a single one. Rin had said yes in a second. The love between them was completely mutual. She was his and he was hers. They had planned their wedding for the 16th.

It was the 15th and Rin was dying in Kakashi's arms.

His eyes were drawn to Rin's hands at her comment about her engagement ring. Rin's hands were missing. Completely gone, taken off with a clean chop of a Kunai knife. All that was left of Rin's healing hands were two bloody and broken stumps.

Who ever had battled Rin knew what her greatest power was. The person, who removed her hands, knew they were taking her strongest weapon. She was a medical ninja that was valued by Konoha, the work she had done was known through out the country of fire.

Kakashi's body was numb to him now. The pain had dissipated, replaced by an over whelming fear. His mind had once again won over his body. No more did he concern himself with the sting of his injuries, or the dizziness brought on by a loss of blood. He moved his broken arms, forcing the muscles to wake in displeasure.

The pulse he had searched for was faint. Her heart was failing, just as Kakashi's was. He shifted and wrapped an arm around her crushed shoulders. With the other arm he took hold of her small waist. Softly, Kakashi pulled Rin close to him. More crimson started to trail down his cheeks. It wasn't just the blood irritating his eyes that made him cry now.

Kakashi leaned down over Rin. He cradled her in his arms like a new born. His touch was gentle, as if he were trying to hold onto the light of day. His lips met Rin's softly in a kiss. He felt her return the kiss. Compared to Kakashi, Rin's lips were cold. He didn't have a chance to notice the chill on her lips though; the love he found in her kiss blinded him to everything but her.

Sometimes he wanted to fade into her kiss. It was a place that made him feel at peace and as if everyone wasn't alone in the world. He found in Rin a reminder of why friends mattered over the mission. He had grown addicted to the warmth he felt when their lips met. The sensation he'd feel when they kissed made Kakashi's heart leap with joy, no matter the circumstances.

He felt himself break away from his small piece of heaven. Kakashi suddenly felt cold again, realization of Rin's fate started to seep into his mind. He ground his teeth together for a moment as he fought to push the truth far from his thoughts. If he wasn't so tired he might have fought a better battle against fear, but the odds were against him. Kakashi felt a chain being placed around his neck and his heart by a single thought. He felt the euphoria from his kiss with Rin turn to a double edged sword that cut through him.

_(Rin… is going to die.)_ Kakashi thought with a violent shiver.

"Rin-chan… don't be sorry, just don't leave me," Kakashi said slowly. He looked down at her face and locked his eyes with hers.

Rin's head limply fell against Kakashi's nearly bare chest. Her blood soaked hair was wet against his warm dry skin.

Her eyes looked up into Kakashi's red ones. A few red tear splashed her face as she looked at him.

"Leave you… Kakashi-kun… you know I'd never… do that. We're… getting married… remember?"

"I can't forget…" Kakashi answered, his words were almost trapped by his dry throat.

"How… did this happen to you…?" He added slowly, his tongue battled dryness and fatigue.

Rin sighed as she took an uneasy breath. Her chest rose with more and more difficulty as time passed. Kakashi could feel her breaths becoming shallower. He gripped her tighter, his fingers pressing into her broken body. He held onto her as if he could pull her away from death's eager hands.

"I was trying… to help Gai. They were going… to kill him… I couldn't… just let him die...," Was Rin's weak response.

Kakashi felt his heart starting to bang against the sides of his broken ribs. More tears raced down his face, as black clouds gathered above head. The corpses Kakashi had pulled Rin from were starting to disappear into utter darkness. Though Kakashi couldn't see them, he could hear their screams as they sank into the nightmare the battle field had become. Amongst the screaming he also heard death hush her victims tirelessly. She wanted to watched Kakashi and Rin without disruption.

"You've… always been too kind Rin-chan… always trying to save everyone," Kakashi said choking on his few words.

Rin almost ignored his response. Her soft smile grew on her face.

"I can hear… your heart Kakashi-kun… it's so strong… so alive," She mumbled into his chest.

He looked down at her. The mystical smile on her face was cannon of Rin. It made an appearance when she was hiding something from him, or when she was most peaceful.

"What about your heart?" he said sharply. Kakashi spoke out of fear; he and death were still on terrible terms since he had watched Obito die.

"I'm not… worried about my heart… I don't have to worry about… it stopping. I know it'll beat… as long as you live…"

"What are you talking about Rin-chan…?" Kakashi replied in confusion.

Rin weakly tried to cuddle closer to Kakashi. She wanted to feel his warmth; his strong arms around her made her feel strong, as if nothing could harm her.

"Tell me about… our wedding tomorrow Kakashi-kun," Rin murmured quietly.

Kakashi was silent. His mind was starting to slow because of unavoidable fatigue. He was trying to mull over Rin's words in his mind but he couldn't understand what she was trying to tell him. Then again, it was typically that Rin left him confused. She somehow saw what he so easily over looked, found hope where he saw none.

"I… want to hear about… how handsome you look… about… how bright and warm it'll be… tell me about the vows you wrote…"

Kakashi felt his parched tongue start to stir in his mouth. He was starting to understand Rin's request, but just hardly. It was like a candle in the night. It provided little light, but was able to guide someone's way.

"You… looked beautiful Rin-chan… I don't think Konoha had ever seen a more beautiful bride than you… I looked at you… and almost forgot my vows. Then I remembered…"

Kakashi paused as realized the red in his eyes was starting to clear. The blood that had tainted his vision had leaked out through the tears that ran down his face.

"Tell me more Kakashi-kun… tell me your vows… won't you?"

"I… Hatake Kakashi… promise to always love you Rin-chan. In war time and in peace, you will always be one and only. I swear that even if I have to give my life… I will protect you… you're… my…," Kakashi stopped.

He started to cough violently. A large painful lump formed in his throat. With the tears that poured down his face, the red tint he had become accustom to faded away more. Now his world was a light pink, like the first light of a dawn. His hands shook as he held onto Rin. He refused to let her go. Kakashi choked on a sob that he refused to let free.

"Protect me now Kakashi-kun…," Rin wheezed. Kakashi could feel her flesh starting to go cold in his hands.

"But you're…," He started to say but paused again.

Kakashi fought hard against the urge to start sobbing. If he were to let his emotions loose now, he would give death its sick pleasure. He could feel it starting to creep over Rin. Kakashi remembered the aura around Obito before he died. He felt that same aura taking Rin. He wanted to scream, to fight away death, as if he could drive it off with a Kunai knife or a Chidori.

Death laid a hand on Rin. He could feel it being gentle to Rin, almost as if it didn't want to kill her. Maybe death was returning the kindness Rin showed to every human, back to her.

Death turned her once pink cheeks to a ghost like white. It sucked the warmth from her. Rin was always like a sweet wonderful summer to Kakashi, but now death was acting as autumn. It was taking his summer and turning it to a bleak and endless winter. All he could do was hope the thing he hated so much, gave him more time with Rin than this.

He wanted forever, but knew he'd only get seconds.

That's why he hated death.

"If you keep dreaming of me… I can never… leave you… Kakashi-kun," Rin started to say.

Kakashi listened closely, his eyes still fixed on Rin.

"Dream of you…?" He repeated.

Rin's head nodded slightly. "Never… let the dream of our life… die. That way… we'll always be together…," She said, her voice becoming more hushed.

As she said that, the black clouds over head suddenly sprang to life. Without warning a soft warm rain started to fall out of the darkness. The drops were gentle, and soothing. The pounding of water provided a beat that sounded like thousands of hearts beating together.

The earth didn't want to lose Rin as much as Kakashi did. The sky was shedding gentle tears for the girl who stole Kakashi's heart.

Kakashi blinked a few times, his vision was finally clear again. The blood which had covered him before started to metal away with the caress of rain. He saw Rin now, not in a red cover, but a white haze. The tears on his face started to become one with the rain.

Rin closed her eyes, smile still on her face.

"Tell me more… about our dreams…," Rin sighed.

"After we are married… we'll have children…"

"How… many Kakashi-kun?"

"A boy… and a girl… they'll have a spirit like their mother… and be valued by all of Konoha… You will finally become a sensei too Rin-chan… There'll be peace and you'll have a chance to teach… You'll teach hundreds of Genin about what it means… to value your friends over a mission. Konoha's Genin will become great because of you…" Kakashi stopped. The lump in his throat grew a few hundred times.

Rin's chest had stopped rising and falling.

"Rin-chan!"

"Rin-chan!"

"Never… stop… dreaming… Ka…ka…shi…"

Kakashi felt death finally pull Rin away. Her body was still for a moment, and then all of Rin's muscles relaxed at once. She was limp in his arms. Kakashi no longer felt his Rin in his arms. All he held was an empty shell.

Kakashi gazed at Rin's face which had been washed clean by the rain that fell. There was no more dirt or blood staining her skin. He waited a moment for her eyes to open. Kakashi looked at her with baited breath. He expected her eyes to shoot open any moment and for her to laugh at him, because he fell for her little gag.

His wounds started to burn worse than ever because of the rain that fell. The pure water irritated his open cuts and breaks.

"Oi! Oi! He's over here! Kakashi! Kakashi!" In the distance, he thought he heard someone calling for him.

Kakashi was frozen. He heard the splash of numerous footsteps in the rain. Large puddles were disturbed feet.

"Oi! Ka…," Gai ran up besides Kakashi. It was then, that his tired black eyes fell on Rin.

Right on Gai's heels was Anko. She like Gai, was in a state of shock at what she saw. She moved aside bodies as she came closer to Kakashi and Rin. She felt her breath get caught in her throat.

"Kakashi?" She asked timidly.

He didn't move, Kakashi just stared at Rin's beautiful face.

Anko looked at Rin's beaten, dead body and then looked up at Gai. They both knew Kakashi was still in horrible shape and needed treatment. Anko bent down in front of Kakashi. She placed a hand lightly on his shoulder. She tried to look into his eyes, but she couldn't get him to look up. Her bandaged hand didn't move from him. She felt denial kick in as she tried to smile at Kakashi. She would cry for Rin, as soon as she knew Kakashi was alright. Right now her own emotions didn't matter.

"Come on Kakashi… lets go," She whispered.

"I… can't stop. I can't ever stop…," Kakashi muttered. His will to fight against his body had completely fallen apart. His eyes started to close; they were only half open now. A small slit of gray and red remained visible. The rain was starting to lull him into an exhausted sleep. He had lost too much blood, and the emotional stress was too much for even him. He started to sway slightly.

Gai took a few careful steps to stand behind Kakashi. He pulled his rival back, attempting to pick him up. He couldn't get very far though; Kakashi's knuckles were white as he clung to Rin's body.

"Anko…," Gai muttered.

"I know," She answered. Anko reached out and started to pull Rin's body away from Kakashi.

"No… No!" He started to shout in his still rough voice. His eyes tried to open wider but his body wouldn't allow it. His vision was unfocused; he reached blindly out holding onto Rin.

"Don't worry Kakashi… we'll take care of Rin…," Anko said, trying to sooth him slightly.

Kakashi listened to Anko's voice and he felt Rin slip from his grasp. His fingers slid over her wet and torn dress.

Everything started to slow for Kakashi. He didn't feel death around him anymore, it had moved on. The screaming of the dead had become distant to Kakashi as well, drowned out by the rain.

His mind was finally becoming victim to the state his body was in. He felt himself being lifted by Gai. His heavy eye lids closed. His cheeks felt warm from the light drops of rain that trickled down his face. Kakashi's clothes became heavy with the warm rain. He felt his whole body warmed, it was the only kind of warmth that Rin gave him.

"Rest Kakashi," Gai said as he started to walk. The bounce of his steps brought Kakashi closer and closer to a deep sleep. He felt himself falling into his dreams, and away from the nightmares he had experienced in reality. Kakashi was shielded from the pain of his loss by the weight of sleep on his mind.

He knew that in his dreams is where he'd always be able to find her. His mind drifted and the pain of his injuries became distant again. Anko and Gai's voices faded. The loneness that Kakashi had felt when Rin's soul left her body became non-existent. Just as death as pulled Rin away, Kakashi's dreams pulled him in another direction. They led him away from blood and burning bodies, instead they took him to her. Kakashi felt himself sinking deeper into sleep. He felt his mind relinquish control to his subconscious.

"_Never stop dreaming Kakashi-kun!"_

"_I swear I won't Rin-chan…"_

"_You're going to be late for our wedding!"_

"_You know I'm not good with being on time."_

"_That had better change Kakashi-kun! I won't have you being late for the rest of our lives!"_

He smiled as he heard her voice, clear as ever.


End file.
